Oh this day of your birth, I will forever more celebrate you and the life you lived. I will celebrate everything you brought to my life- new cyber friends who make me smile and give me faith in the goodness of mankind, an appreciation for yellow flowers, dance music & wine(but I already loved that), and reminders to cherish my family- especially my sister and to be a better friend. So while I am sad that your kind and generous spirit is no longer with us on this earth, I will smile for you because I know you live on and your spirit continues to change lives for the better here.
Pump up that music in heaven because the party has already started down here.
Definitely Shut Up and Dance with Me. I also really love I Lived. Barefoot & Bruised by Jamestown Story was playing when we last saw Diem and Ct together on the Challenge so that one breaks my heart but I love it anyway. Actually I love the three Jamestown Story songs which played during act and Diem moments on the Challenge.
And of course the songs from the Memorial Video Carrie Ainsworth did are amazing. Kiss Me by Ed Sheeran, Atlas Hands by Benjamin Francis Leftwich, and Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.
As as for tumblr, you probably came across skimthrough 's Tumblr. She has various playlists dedicated to them. All are fantastic. Maddie's tumblr and Maddie herself are awesome.
Sorry my reply is so late; I haven't been here in a while! I love I Lived too; that's a good one! I haven't heard Barefoot & Bruised (other than on the show), but I'll have to check it out. Yes, there's a good chance it was Maddie's tumblr! I follow her on Twitter because we have mutual friends, but I don't know if I follow her on tumblr. I'll have to go look for her tumblr now and see her playlists!
I love this post. It almost made me cry. Thank you for sharing it. <3
Did Diem not like Dancing with the Stars? lol, I don't know that story!
She LOVED Dancing with the Stars and we tried to get her on the show, she even auditioned at one point but there was someone else that they chose to go with ( a bigger name) - So in my unreseaonably angry grief I sent messages to Len Goodman, Bruno Tonioli and several producers carrying on about how much it would have meant to her and they didn't allow her that... I was losing my mind a bit... I'm sure if it weren't so fricken pathetic it would have been hilarious. However, I continue my boycott!
haha! I love DWTS too. I'm going to see Derek and Julianne Hough's tour again this summer! (Which isn't quite the same as the DWTS tour, but semi-related!) I went last year too. And it's funny because I didn't know if Diem liked DWTS, but she was the first person I thought of when I saw their show last June because I knew she loved dancing and I was like, "I should tweet her about this amazing show! They said they're gonna do it again next year so I think I'll wait until they announce it and then I'll tell her she should go see it!" Obviously, that wasn't possible, and it made me kinda sad. It would have been awesome if she was on the show! I wish they would've picked her! Half of the "big names" they have aren't really big names anyway, and I think people would've liked to see her on there.
Well sweet girl - I know you know all that has been happening. My constant chatter must keep you away from so many other more interesting things - thank you for the little pick me ups over the last week! I really did need them. The photo was everything though and Maria now will never think me any crazier than I actually am again - she took a bunch of pictures that morning of her dogs and none of the others had any glare, blurs... nothing, only the one in my spot for me thinking about you! I got it, and if no one else does well tsk bleep tsk right.
I thought that Wednesday was going to be the day... should I have followed? I dont' know. It will happen when you're ready. In the meantime, care to point me to the journal I was writing to you or did you hide it so I have to go back to the writing project? That scares me, I still have the who the hell am I to take that on issue feeling.
Word has started to leak out via NYC grapevine about plans for this summer. BUT you know there will still be "oh that's not true people". I got an apology from one of them - hahaha, who would expect that right? You will be pleased to know that gay marriage is national today. Missing you chicka but I will ramble on the way to the hospital...get tea xo
Semi-Sweet can you explain this post? Is from a conversation you had with Diem? Just confirming..thanks
Oh I am relatively insane now and continue talk to, write to, email, tweet... her as if nothing has changed... I find it cathartic. She responds in different ways... or I have gone off the deep end and am entirely bonkers...but she already knew all the best people are <3
Do you mean a planned summer wedding? Not trying to spread false rumors but I heard something about that and am wondering if there's any truth to it. So incredibly sad if that was the plan.
I love your posts, semisweet. I'm honestly surprised at how often I think of diem, nearly every day. I only knew her from a few back and forth tweets but like many others, feel a terrible loss.
Agent 99 - aww thanks! You're not alone I hear from people all the time how much they are still in denial, or hurt just to think of her.... She affected many, many more people than she ever realized! Her sister Megan has said they knew she had some devoted fans but had no idea the powerful impact she had had on families, loved ones, surviors, current patients all in addition to MTV fans! Her human side was SO much more than the celebrity side,i t is really sad for the people who only saw the MTV portion of her, it is a limited edited view as a whole person, she was human, flawed like everyone but my God she was an amazing genuine, kind, loving human being with incredible energy when it came to helping someone...hell anyone - she was simply put... a force! Miss you D
Time continues to pass and the healing for all parties continues......never complete, but easier by the day, until it becomes a private thought to only be shared with a chosen few on given occasions. After I finished doing my yard work today, I sat in my backyard admiring my handywork and I thought how lucky I was to be enjoying the day.
For a strange reason I thought of CT and how he was coping with the loss of Diem, did he feel guilt? did he express himself fully to her? how does he move forward? does he comprehend that quit possibly the most influential female in his lifetime is no longer with him except in spirit?
Its hard to imagine when you are in your 30's as he is yet to grow signifantly older without her.......any macho bravado will fade at some point into a deep understanding.......I don't envy him when that moment occurs.
I feel strongly that he loved her deeply, she was his counterpart, good times and bad....but always there.
I thought of V1Man and the intimate pain, the loss is consuming....what feels the gap?
Alas, I have the wisdom of age on my side.......I know what lies ahead and wish them only the best.
I really miss Diem. I know we all do. It's unfair that she's no longer here, but I guess God never promised fairness in life. I have days when I'm able to really smile thinking of her and feel so much positivity for what she accomplished while she was here and other days when I still get sad and tear up. I think what makes death so hard to comprehend for so many is the finality of it all. There is no bargaining to ask God can Diem at least come down from heaven once a year to visit us all, but I know Diem is happy and pain free where she is. It's those on earth that she left behind that have to find peace within themselves now. We know logically that Diem is in a better place but it's not always enough to make us feel better because selfishly we want her here with us. I still think about CT a lot and check his instagram page from time to time. I know he won't post anything new, but I read other folks messages of comfort to him underneath the pictures he has posted of Diem. I do wish we would hear from CT more but at the same time I know he needs more time and he is not obligated to come back online at all, it's up to him. Privacy is so very important at a time like this.
I really miss Diem. I know we all do. It's unfair that she's no longer here, but I guess God Satan never promised fairness in life. I have days when I'm able to really smile thinking of her and feel so much positivity for what she accomplished while she was here and other days when I still get sad and tear up. I think what makes death so hard to comprehend for so many is the finality of it all. There is no bargaining to ask God can Diem at least come down from heaven once a year to visit us all, but I know Diem is happy and pain free where she is. It's those on earth that she left behind that have to find peace within themselves now. We know logically that Diem is in a better place but it's not always enough to make us feel better because selfishly we want her here with us. I still think about CT a lot and check his instagram page from time to time. I know he won't post anything new, but I read other folks messages of comfort to him underneath the pictures he has posted of Diem. I do wish we would hear from CT more but at the same time I know he needs more time and he is not obligated to come back online at all, it's up to him. Privacy is so very important at a time like this.
No I don't think God promises that the world will be fair, there is sin in the world and things that happen that the human mind can't possibly understand. I didn't say God was responsible for unfairness, just said God doesn't promise it. It's a deep question. I've been blessed by God in many ways though and I'm grateful to God for so many things in my life. I think others can say the same about whatever higher power they speak to, no matter if you are Jewish, Christian, Buddhist, whatever the case may be.
I wasn't trying to have a debate over religion though. I posted more just to express my thoughts of missing Diem.
Does anyone ever like go to Diem's Twitter page and just look at it? I find myself doing that very often. Then today I went to her Instagram and looked at her pics and watched this video of her dancing. I miss her presence. I'm like still in shock at the fact that she is gone and kinda how long it's been. It'll be a year in November. Which isn't long but it's just doesn't seem like it. Idk.
I will say though that she is life goals. Still. Like her body was EVERYTHING! Got me tryin to come up lmao
I do look at her Twitter and Instagram. Sometimes occasionally, and in some stretches often.
It feels very strange to have not known her personally to but to miss her existence in this world. I've never experienced anything quite like it.
Does anyone ever like go to Diem's Twitter page and just look at it? I find myself doing that very often. Then today I went to her Instagram and looked at her pics and watched this video of her dancing. I miss her presence. I'm like still in shock at the fact that she is gone and kinda how long it's been. It'll be a year in November. Which isn't long but it's just doesn't seem like it. Idk.
I will say though that she is life goals. Still. Like her body was EVERYTHING! Got me tryin to come up lmao
I do look at her Twitter and Instagram. Sometimes occasionally, and in some stretches often.
It feels very strange to have not known her personally to but to miss her existence in this world. I've never experienced anything quite like it.
Does anyone ever like go to Diem's Twitter page and just look at it? I find myself doing that very often. Then today I went to her Instagram and looked at her pics and watched this video of her dancing. I miss her presence. I'm like still in shock at the fact that she is gone and kinda how long it's been. It'll be a year in November. Which isn't long but it's just doesn't seem like it. Idk.
I will say though that she is life goals. Still. Like her body was EVERYTHING! Got me tryin to come up lmao
I do look at her Twitter and Instagram. Sometimes occasionally, and in some stretches often.
It feels very strange to have not known her personally to but to miss her existence in this world. I've never experienced anything quite like it.
Does anyone ever like go to Diem's Twitter page and just look at it? I find myself doing that very often. Then today I went to her Instagram and looked at her pics and watched this video of her dancing. I miss her presence. I'm like still in shock at the fact that she is gone and kinda how long it's been. It'll be a year in November. Which isn't long but it's just doesn't seem like it. Idk.
I will say though that she is life goals. Still. Like her body was EVERYTHING! Got me tryin to come up lmao
Love you Diem <3
I still do it too, or hear a song and grab my phone to send it too her - with a sweet girl this will move you.....
I'm going to an event with friends and was thinking about how much Diem would have loved it, while I'm having these thoughts I get a twitter notification of a quote Diem had sent me before about we don't get a good life or a bad life we get a life and make of it what we will...we had a long chat about that, how it is important to do all kinds of things...especially if it scares you. when I saw the quote, I teared but smiled and thought I know D, I'm making the most of it but I still wish you were here showing us the right way to embrace it all!
Happy Birthday baby
Happy Birthday to the gorgeous Diem!
Happy Birthday Diem!!! Rest Easy-
Happy birthday Beautiful Angel Diem!
Oh this day of your birth, I will forever more celebrate you and the life you lived. I will celebrate everything you brought to my life- new cyber friends who make me smile and give me faith in the goodness of mankind, an appreciation for yellow flowers, dance music & wine(but I already loved that), and reminders to cherish my family- especially my sister and to be a better friend. So while I am sad that your kind and generous spirit is no longer with us on this earth, I will smile for you because I know you live on and your spirit continues to change lives for the better here.
Pump up that music in heaven because the party has already started down here.
Happy Birthday Diem!!!
Happy Birthday Diem, I hope you are celebrating this day as you used to do it... Dancing in a rain. I really miss you...
I will drink for you today and pray for your calm rest.
Love you, Diem.
Happy Birthday Angel Diem! Miss you so much!
Sorry my reply is so late; I haven't been here in a while! I love I Lived too; that's a good one! I haven't heard Barefoot & Bruised (other than on the show), but I'll have to check it out. Yes, there's a good chance it was Maddie's tumblr! I follow her on Twitter because we have mutual friends, but I don't know if I follow her on tumblr. I'll have to go look for her tumblr now and see her playlists!
I love this post. It almost made me cry. Thank you for sharing it. <3
Did Diem not like Dancing with the Stars? lol, I don't know that story!
She LOVED Dancing with the Stars and we tried to get her on the show, she even auditioned at one point but there was someone else that they chose to go with ( a bigger name) - So in my unreseaonably angry grief I sent messages to Len Goodman, Bruno Tonioli and several producers carrying on about how much it would have meant to her and they didn't allow her that... I was losing my mind a bit... I'm sure if it weren't so fricken pathetic it would have been hilarious. However, I continue my boycott!
I have serious Diem issues
haha! I love DWTS too. I'm going to see Derek and Julianne Hough's tour again this summer! (Which isn't quite the same as the DWTS tour, but semi-related!) I went last year too. And it's funny because I didn't know if Diem liked DWTS, but she was the first person I thought of when I saw their show last June because I knew she loved dancing and I was like, "I should tweet her about this amazing show! They said they're gonna do it again next year so I think I'll wait until they announce it and then I'll tell her she should go see it!" Obviously, that wasn't possible, and it made me kinda sad. It would have been awesome if she was on the show! I wish they would've picked her! Half of the "big names" they have aren't really big names anyway, and I think people would've liked to see her on there.
Well sweet girl - I know you know all that has been happening. My constant chatter must keep you away from so many other more interesting things - thank you for the little pick me ups over the last week! I really did need them. The photo was everything though and Maria now will never think me any crazier than I actually am again - she took a bunch of pictures that morning of her dogs and none of the others had any glare, blurs... nothing, only the one in my spot for me thinking about you! I got it, and if no one else does well tsk bleep tsk right.
I thought that Wednesday was going to be the day... should I have followed? I dont' know. It will happen when you're ready. In the meantime, care to point me to the journal I was writing to you or did you hide it so I have to go back to the writing project? That scares me, I still have the who the hell am I to take that on issue feeling.
Word has started to leak out via NYC grapevine about plans for this summer. BUT you know there will still be "oh that's not true people". I got an apology from one of them - hahaha, who would expect that right? You will be pleased to know that gay marriage is national today. Missing you chicka but I will ramble on the way to the hospital...get tea xo
Semi-Sweet can you explain this post? Is from a conversation you had with Diem? Just confirming..thanks
Oh I am relatively insane now and continue talk to, write to, email, tweet... her as if nothing has changed... I find it cathartic. She responds in different ways... or I have gone off the deep end and am entirely bonkers...but she already knew all the best people are <3
msg from D.jpg
Do you mean a planned summer wedding? Not trying to spread false rumors but I heard something about that and am wondering if there's any truth to it. So incredibly sad if that was the plan.
Yes Semisweet, please PM me. I have e mailed you privately. Maybe I have the wrong e mail but if you can, please do.
I love your posts, semisweet. I'm honestly surprised at how often I think of diem, nearly every day. I only knew her from a few back and forth tweets but like many others, feel a terrible loss.
Justintime I responded.
Agent 99 - aww thanks! You're not alone I hear from people all the time how much they are still in denial, or hurt just to think of her....
She affected many, many more people than she ever realized! Her sister Megan has said they knew she had some devoted fans but had no idea the powerful impact she had had on families, loved ones, surviors, current patients all in addition to MTV fans! Her human side was SO much more than the celebrity side,i t is really sad for the people who only saw the MTV portion of her, it is a limited edited view as a whole person, she was human, flawed like everyone but my God she was an amazing genuine, kind, loving human being with incredible energy when it came to helping someone...hell anyone - she was simply put... a force! Miss you D
Time continues to pass and the healing for all parties continues......never complete, but easier by the day, until it becomes a private thought to only be shared with a chosen few on given occasions. After I finished doing my yard work today, I sat in my backyard admiring my handywork and I thought how lucky I was to be enjoying the day.
For a strange reason I thought of CT and how he was coping with the loss of Diem, did he feel guilt? did he express himself fully to her? how does he move forward? does he comprehend that quit possibly the most influential female in his lifetime is no longer with him except in spirit?
Its hard to imagine when you are in your 30's as he is yet to grow signifantly older without her.......any macho bravado will fade at some point into a deep understanding.......I don't envy him when that moment occurs.
I feel strongly that he loved her deeply, she was his counterpart, good times and bad....but always there.
I thought of V1Man and the intimate pain, the loss is consuming....what feels the gap?
Alas, I have the wisdom of age on my side.......I know what lies ahead and wish them only the best.
beautifully said... I believe CT is more acutely aware than people realize and that thought is heartbreaking
I really miss Diem. I know we all do. It's unfair that she's no longer here, but I guess God never promised fairness in life. I have days when I'm able to really smile thinking of her and feel so much positivity for what she accomplished while she was here and other days when I still get sad and tear up. I think what makes death so hard to comprehend for so many is the finality of it all. There is no bargaining to ask God can Diem at least come down from heaven once a year to visit us all, but I know Diem is happy and pain free where she is. It's those on earth that she left behind that have to find peace within themselves now. We know logically that Diem is in a better place but it's not always enough to make us feel better because selfishly we want her here with us. I still think about CT a lot and check his instagram page from time to time. I know he won't post anything new, but I read other folks messages of comfort to him underneath the pictures he has posted of Diem. I do wish we would hear from CT more but at the same time I know he needs more time and he is not obligated to come back online at all, it's up to him. Privacy is so very important at a time like this.
No I don't think God promises that the world will be fair, there is sin in the world and things that happen that the human mind can't possibly understand. I didn't say God was responsible for unfairness, just said God doesn't promise it. It's a deep question. I've been blessed by God in many ways though and I'm grateful to God for so many things in my life. I think others can say the same about whatever higher power they speak to, no matter if you are Jewish, Christian, Buddhist, whatever the case may be.
I wasn't trying to have a debate over religion though. I posted more just to express my thoughts of missing Diem.
Miss you Diem so badly, hope you doing well right there.
((hugs)) to you!
Does anyone ever like go to Diem's Twitter page and just look at it? I find myself doing that very often. Then today I went to her Instagram and looked at her pics and watched this video of her dancing. I miss her presence. I'm like still in shock at the fact that she is gone and kinda how long it's been. It'll be a year in November. Which isn't long but it's just doesn't seem like it. Idk.
I will say though that she is life goals. Still. Like her body was EVERYTHING! Got me tryin to come up lmao
Love you Diem <3
I do look at her Twitter and Instagram. Sometimes occasionally, and in some stretches often.
It feels very strange to have not known her personally to but to miss her existence in this world. I've never experienced anything quite like it.
I still do it too, or hear a song and grab my phone to send it too her - with a sweet girl this will move you.....
I'm going to an event with friends and was thinking about how much Diem would have loved it, while I'm having these thoughts I get a twitter notification of a quote Diem had sent me before about we don't get a good life or a bad life we get a life and make of it what we will...we had a long chat about that, how it is important to do all kinds of things...especially if it scares you. when I saw the quote, I teared but smiled and thought I know D, I'm making the most of it but I still wish you were here showing us the right way to embrace it all!
Miss ya Diem!
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