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The 20th season of the MTV flagship series The Real World debuts to the masses tonight at 10 PM. I have yet to see the first episode which was offered into the wild via Comcast OnDemand last week, but already have an outline in my head as to what this season has to offer. Of course, I only have a superficial impression based on what the MTV Public Relations machine has given us, and I am sure with time I will have a better appreciation of each cast member (with my initial assumptions becoming a thing of the past.)
With that being said, I am going to announce the Pre-Season Real World Hollywood Awards:
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[B]Most likely to end up in the "LA Hilton" (a.k.a. the Twin Towers Correctional Facility.)[/B]
This was a tough decision with such a rich field of applicants, but being Brianna was already attending a court hearing in Philadelphia during the filming of the season, she became the automatic front runner for this vaunted award. Also, the temper that was witnessed on the initial Hollywood preview trailer lends credence to the working theory that she doesn't put up with much shit, and that could definitely play into her future housing accommodations.
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[B]Most likely to end up [I]in[/I] Paris Hilton[/B]
Sarah, Reva, Janelle, Parisa, et al. The list goes on and on. The playboy for this season based on my highly scientific algorithms is Mr. Will Gilbert. Rumor has it the local Circle-K had to order condoms by the truck load just to keep the store shelves stocked. If you own shares of [I]Church & Dwight[/I] (makers of Trojan) be sure to send Mr Gilbert a thank you card for the assistance in helping to weather the current economic downturn.
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[B]Most likely to [I]end[/I] Paris Hilton[/B]
As much as I can tell that I am going to fall in love with the soft side of Joey, that crazy 1000 yard stare that we saw in the teaser makes me think that he is a ticking time bomb waiting to go off. We know from the rumor mill that he ran into some trouble with cocaine during his stay in the City of Angels, and I know that if I was high as a kite and pumped on "adrenaline" I'd want to off me a Hilton too. The odds are extremely low of this actually happening, but someone had to win!
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[B]Most likely to end up as Paris Hilton's BFF[/B]
I hate to say it, but I pre-judged Kim 4 months ago. The moment I saw her picture I could hear the Carly Simon song "You're so vain" piping through my mental jukebox. Who better to befriend the infamously self centered Paris than a less wealthy, less famous, less attractive clone? You know Miss Hilton hates to be overshadowed and that would not be a concern with Kimmy in trail. Alright, I promise I am going to be objective when I watch tonight, but Kim is totally starting out in the dog house.
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[B]Most likely to end up as Paris Hilton's Pool Boy[/B]
Hands down, there is only one Tool boy in this cast that would even be in the running to be Paris's Pool boy. Greg's ****** bag, no talent reputation precedes him going into this season as he has been polluting Real World fans lives ever since the launch of the realworldcasting.com site last summer. With his receding hairline, vacant personality, and a striking resemblance to Urkel from Family Matters, it will only be a matter of time before he considers a steady job skimming algae to be the best he can do in life.
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[B]Honorable mentions:[/B]
Sarah, Dave: Most likely to be forgotten by Paris Hilton
I am looking forward to seeing what this season has to offer and with the slow downward spiral that this franchise has been going through over the years, we can only hope that this fresh cast of characters brings new life to the series and offers us a reason to watch. Everything I have seen and heard thus far leads me to believe this is going to be one of the best seasons in quite some time, and maybe just maybe the end of the season awards will be a bit more flattering.
Only time will tell...