I thought it would be fun to say goodbye....Really. part 1

So I went.

I was coming off the end of a cold.

I felt-meh

And still I went to meet the people who I watched when I was 12; when the show was not only relevant, but tackling issues that made you think and discuss later with your friends. Some of these people made quite an impact on me and I wanted to tell them if they so happened to show there )

Woa.

What I got was That.....and something else entirely.

There are so many things I cant reveal because the actual show has not aired yet...

Here is (some) of my expierence:

I found it strangely ironic that a freak hail storm happened at about 5:30 pm Saturday... (Over 100 hundred Roomates, Press, and 10 camera crews?)

A sleet-like rain was to follow....

The awards were OUTSIDE

The Heavens were giving me a warning: STAY HOME WITH YOUR CAT

I did not listen.

(There goes the fresh blowout. Hair promptly up in a bun)

I am clutching my raincoat because the red carpet just isn’t my thing.... I mostly try to avoid it, someone normally ends up talking me into walking. I go against my better judgement, finding out the next day when the pictures show up online; that I am getting clowned in all directions-

This information coming from well meaning friends and family who have sent me the links to blogs with pictures and snarky comments.

Anyway,

I make it into the house and after greeting Coral who I have not seen for at least three years... I am absolutely overcome with this feeling of Surreal wonderment at what I am seeing.

Some of these Mo Fo’ are CA-CA-CA-CRAZY

Really.

Some of the people I met were surprisingly self aware...

Some people were peeing in the shower... *but that’s what you get when you put a bunch of drunk monkeys together some wang gets pulled out and here come bodily fluids....

(****ats)

The general consensus of the individuals that I spoke with was that it would be a way to say hello (for some) and good bye to a bittersweet expierence that only 180 or so of us really and truly understand.

I now have come to understand that reality television (for the most part) has become mindless entertainment. It is a bunch of strong conflicting personalities in extraordianry situations, filmed- for you to watch and (judge) if you so desire.

And:

You get what you pay for....

I dont expect to win any awards for putting my dysfunction on blast for the masses . I got way more out of the situation than I ever thought possible... I have learned more about myself in 5+ years than most people in a lifetime~ and for that I am so, so blessed.

For my whole life I have wanted to be an entertainer/writer/chef of some sort..and in my own way I am still searching for my ’Vein of Gold’ so to speak that will really and truly be a joy of a ’job’...

I am still sussing it all out figuring out my talents and learning how to cultivate them properly...

I am really grateful that I did the Real World. MTV and Bunim-Murry put me in front of Millions and I mean MILLIONS of people all around the world.

You all know that I am a human being just like you. I am not a product of some fanciful and glittery machine that pops me out all Gold Spun perfection for you to consume.

And for those of you who DONT KNOW:

I dont thrust myself in your face on your television screen at every opportunity available:

ONE Challenge.

The Reunion.

Nor do show up at places/events that have nothing to do with me in the hopes to be photographed.

I dont go out to clubs and create a spectacle of myself to generate attention.

I care about the environment. Not because it is a cool celebrity bandwagon to jump on...but because I love the earth, I love life, and I WANT TO LIVE DAMMIT!

With CLEAN AIR AND CLEAN WATER....

With delicious pure FOOD.

And I went to this ’Awards Show’ to say Goodbye to the Show that has given me a platform to follow my dreams....

When I walked into that house I walked into a Nightmare.

Absolute bedlam.

Mayhem.

I guess no one actually read the memo that it would be a "Roast".

I bet most people thought it meant they would be having a Roast (for dinner) because shit got real interesting when the jokes started.

Did I mention I was also STONE COLD SOBER THE WHOLE NIGHT???

No joke. I went into the Pits of Hell with no libation to ease the pain...

Kids: DRINKS and DRUGS are bad. They age you quite quickly....and since I refuse to get lifts and botox....I have given up the sauce.

I stayed until I really just could’nt anymore.

Which was about 11:00....

The whole thing was.....

Sad.

Really,

Truly;

Sad...

It made me sad.....
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More to come....

Originally Posted by Katiedid

I'm interested to see what Arissa will write after the show airs. How long is the show going to be? I wonder if the majority of people who aren't the most memorable will even get any facetime on the show?